Autumn Inspiration Beauty 2

What did the tree say to autumn? leaf me alone.

Why did summer catch autumn? Because autumn is fall.

What did one autumn leaf say to another? I'm falling for you.

Why do the Boston Red Sox fans love autumn? Because watching the leaves fall reminds them of the (Yankees).

How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch

Why are trees very forgiving? Because in the Fall they "Let It Go" and in the Spring they "turn over a new leaf".

What falls in autumn? Leaves!

What is the cutest season? Awwtumn.

What's the ratio of a pumpkin's circumference to its diameter? Pumpkin Pi

What do you call a large colorful pile of leaves? The Great Barrier Leaf.

What do you give to a pumpkin who is trying to quit smoking? A pumpkin patch!

How do leaves get from place to place? With autumn-mobiles.

How does an Elephant get out of a tree? Sits on a leaf and waits till Autumn!

What did a tree fighting with autumn say? That's it, i'm leaving.

What will fall on the lawn first? An autumn leaf or a Christmas catalogue?

What do you call a tree that doubts autumn?

Disbe-leaf.

What is a tree's least favorite month?

Sep-timber!

“Aprils have never meant much to me, autumns seem that season of beginning, spring.”
― Truman Capote, Breakfast at Tiffany's

“Autumn...the year's last, loveliest smile."

[Indian Summer]”
― William Cullen Bryant

“October, baptize me with leaves! Swaddle me in corduroy and nurse me with split pea soup. October, tuck tiny candy bars in my pockets and carve my smile into a thousand pumpkins. O autumn! O teakettle! O grace!”
― Rainbow Rowell, Attachments

“Why is summer mist romantic and autumn mist just sad?”
― Dodie Smith, I Capture the Castle

Autumn Bar Jokes

Art Gallery

A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked women with only her privates covered with leaves. The wife doesn't like it and moves on but the huband keeps looking. The wife asks: "What are you waiting for?" The husband replies: "Autumn."

One Liners

This autumn we can look forward to falling leaves and rising gas prices. We'll be raking it up while the oil companies are raking it in. If money did grow on trees, autumn would be the best season ever! Blue eyed girls like autumn because it bring their eyes out. It's so strange that autumn is so beautiful, but everything is really dying On the first day of autumn (autumnal equinox), the number of hours of daylight and darkness are approximately equal. Autumn is a time when death is golden and beautiful. Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower

“Autumn seemed to arrive suddenly that year. The morning of the first September was crisp and golden as an apple.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

“Autumn is the hardest season. The leaves are all falling, and they're falling like
they're falling in love with the ground.”
― Andrea Gibson

“Her pleasure in the walk must arise from the exercise and the day, from the view of the last smiles of the year upon the tawny leaves and withered hedges, and from repeating to herself some few of the thousand poetical descriptions extant of autumn--that season of peculiar and inexhaustible influence on the mind of taste and tenderness--that season which has drawn from every poet worthy of being read some attempt at description, or some lines of feeling.”
― Jane Austen, Persuasion

“That country where it is always turning late in the year. That country where the hills are fog and the rivers are mist; where noons go quickly, dusks and twilights linger, and midnights stay. That country composed in the main of cellars, sub-cellars, coal-bins, closets, attics, and pantries faced away from the sun. That country whose people are autumn people, thinking only autumn thoughts. Whose people passing at night on the empty walks sound like rain.”
― Ray Bradbury

“Is not this a true autumn day? Just the still melancholy that I love - that makes life and nature harmonise. The birds are consulting about their migrations, the trees are putting on the hectic or the pallid hues of decay, and begin to strew the ground, that one's very footsteps may not disturb the repose of earth and air, while they give us a scent that is a perfect anodyne to the restless spirit. Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns."

[Letter to Miss Lewis, Oct. 1, 1841]”
― George Eliot, George Eliot's Life, as Related in Her Letters and Journals

“There is something incredibly nostalgic and significant about the annual cascade of autumn leaves.”
― Joe L. Wheeler

“And I rose
In rainy autumn
And walked abroad in a shower of all my days...”
― Dylan Thomas, Collected Poems

“Autumn is as joyful and sweet as an untimely end.”
― Rémy de Gourmont

“He found himself wondering at times, especially in the autumn, about the wild lands, and strange visions of mountains that he had never seen came into his dreams.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring

“She looked like autumn, when leaves turned and fruit ripened.”
― Sarah Addison Allen, Garden Spells

“And now, my poor old woman, why are you crying so bitterly? It is autumn. The leaves are falling from the trees like burning tears- the wind howls. Why must you mimic them?”
― Mervyn Peake, Titus Groan

“I loved autumn, the one season of the year that God seemed to have put there just for the beauty of it.”
― Lee Maynard

“Days decrease, / And autumn grows, autumn in everything.”
― Robert Browning

“I enjoy the spring more than the autumn now. One does, I think, as one gets older.”
― Virginia Woolf, Jacob's Room

“The autumn leaves blew over the moonlit pavement in such a way as to make the girl who was moving there seem fixed to a sliding walk, letting the motion of the wind and the leaves carry her forward. [...] The trees overhead made a great sound of letting down their dry rain.”
― Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451

“It was a beautiful bright autumn day, with air like cider and a sky so blue you could drown in it.”
― Diana Gabaldon, Outlander

“Autumn is the mellower season, and what we lose in flowers we more than gain in fruits.”
― Samuel Butler

“Two sounds of autumn are unmistakable...the hurrying rustle of crisp leaves blown along the street...by a gusty wind, and the gabble of a flock of migrating geese.”

“AUTUMNAL

Pale amber sunlight falls across
The reddening October trees,
That hardly sway before a breeze
As soft as summer: summer's loss
Seems little, dear! on days like these.

Let misty autumn be our part!
The twilight of the year is sweet:
Where shadow and the darkness meet
Our love, a twilight of the heart
Eludes a little time's deceit.

Are we not better and at home
In dreamful Autumn, we who deem
No harvest joy is worth a dream?
A little while and night shall come,
A little while, then, let us dream.

Beyond the pearled horizons lie
Winter and night: awaiting these
We garner this poor hour of ease,
Until love turn from us and die
Beneath the drear November trees.”
― Ernest Dowson, The Poems and Prose of Ernest Dowson

“I was drinking in the surroundings: air so crisp you could snap it with your fingers and greens in every lush shade imaginable offset by autumnal flashes of red and yellow.”
― Wendy Delsol, Stork

“It was one of those perfect English autumnal days which occur more frequently in memory than in life.”
― P.D. James, A Taste for Death

“The tints of autumn...a mighty flower garden blossoming under the spell of the enchanter, frost.”
― John Greenleaf Whittier

“To-day I think
Only with scents, - scents dead leaves yield,
And bracken, and wild carrot's seed,
And the square mustard field;

Odours that rise
When the spade wounds the root of tree,
Rose, currant, raspberry, or goutweed,
Rhubarb or celery;

The smoke's smell, too,
Flowing from where a bonfire burns
The dead, the waste, the dangerous,
And all to sweetness turns.

It is enough
To smell, to crumble the dark earth,
While the robin sings over again
Sad songs of Autumn mirth."

- A poem called DIGGING.”
― Edward Thomas, Collected Poems

“It was one of those days you sometimes get latish in the autumn when the sun beams, the birds toot, and there is a bracing tang in the air that sends the blood beetling briskly through the veins.”
― P.G. Wodehouse

“Just as a painter needs light in order to put the finishing touches to his picture, so I need an inner light, which I feel I never have enough of in the autumn.”
― Leo Tolstoy

“An autumn garden has a sadness when the sun is not shining...”
― Francis Brett Young, Cold Harbour

“Give me juicy autumnal fruit, ripe and red from the orchard."

[Give me the splendid silent sun]”
― Walt Whitman, The Complete Poems

“He had never liked October. Ever since he had first lay in the autumn leaves before his grandmother's house many years ago and heard the wind and saw the empty trees. It had made him cry, without a reason. And a little of that sadness returned each year to him. It always went away with spring.
But, it was a little different tonight. There was a feeling of autumn coming to last a million years.
There would be no spring. ("The October Game")”
― Ray Bradbury, Long After Midnight

“The magic of autumn has seized the countryside; now that the sun isn't ripening anything it shines for the sake of the golden age; for the sake of Eden; to please the moon for all I know.”
― Elizabeth Coatsworth, Personal Geography: Almost an Autobiography

“I saw old Autumn in the misty morn
Stand shadowless like silence, listening
To silence, for no lonely bird would sing
Into his hollow ear from woods forlorn,
Nor lowly hedge nor solitary thorn; --
Shaking his languid locks all dewy bright
With tangled gossamer that fell by night,
Pearling his coronet of golden corn.”
― Thomas Hood

“Night, which in Autumn seems to fall from the sky so suddenly, chilled us...”
― Jules Barbey d'Aurevilly, The Crimson Curtain

“On a bare branch a crow is perched - autumn evening”
― Bashō Matsuo

“I met Anne in the autumn... Autumn, that wild season when rural men rack orchard trees with sticks and weep with the desire to kiss faraway Demeter’s supple breasts—to set lips to her travel-swollen eyes. They seek goddesses, but I desired only Anne. ”
― Roman Payne, Rooftop Soliloquy